(automatic bondage movement autobio) ♤ 《《《

By Miguel Angel Torres (Andrew/s Nicolas Moran), edited by Emmanuel Goldstein. 

Miguel (Andrew/s) is NOT a Sadist, only someone who has survived real Sadists and who played with their benevolent BDSM parody... 

In the following account; some names have been changed and some details have been omitted in order to preserve confidentiality. All else is accurate as far as I remember, but keep in mind that anecdotes based on memory constitute an expression of historiographical subjectivity. 

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PORNOGRAPHY IS THE FEMINISM OF THE FUTURE / Camille Paglia

Quote from Paglia: "Thus feminism blames rape on pornography and, by a smug circularity of reasoning, interprets outbreaks of sadism as a backlash to itself. But rape and sadism have been evident throughout history and, at some moment, in all cultures." 

***Watch iconic post-feminist Camille Paglia explain her views in a 2017 CBC interview HERE...

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>>> April 1999 - February 2001 <<<

/ Amsterdam /

》The Lived Experience of Gay Freedom in Youth 《

Legendary leather bar Argos closed on January 2, 2015. It was the oldest leather bar in Europe. The Argos was originally located at 22 Warmoesstraat, Amsterdam. It opened in 1957 as a guesthouse. Over the years it relocated to Warmoesstraat 95.

(it was for the most part a tourist attraction... the real action for locals was in the private parties. the argos was only a networking hub...to hook up for the parties...it was an honor to be invited...) 

On the Y2K Milleniums Eve (December 31, 1999) I was there for the first part of the festivities before going on to a Reclaim The Streets demo-rave, a warehouse progressive trance party and finally to a Break Beat after-hours that lasted until 12 noon on January 1. 

  >>>> Miguel Angel Torres (Andrew(s) Nicolas Moran) in June 1999... \\\

The party started at 22 hrs and ended at 4 in the morning on weekends, 3 in the morning on weekdays.

(... some private parties would go on for a couple of days... on December 31, 2000 - the millenniums eve that counted - i was asked first to a private party at the legendary stable master hotel nearby (Warmoesstraat #23) and from there ended up in a loft pent-house "rubber duckie" gathering where i was introduced to the dutch version of the "gay rodeo" fetish; naked 17 and 18 year olds rode on the backs of rubber-men as if they were ponies ... ) 

The 'No perfume' sign a the entrance was iconic. At the Argos men had to smell like men. BDSM fun for all ages.  The basement darkroom with its side cabins was a must.  The style of decor was what I call Leather-Queer dungeon. 

 HOME OF THE SLING

(the basement dark rooms are were I was informally inducted into proper gay fetish in 2000 - no inhibitions, let your kink loose, play and be played with...let go...)

I usually arrived on Tram 9, occassionally on Tram 4.

(one night i hooked up with a guy on #4, but i hear "the cruising tram" for gay fetish was #10... never found out for sure...) 

From "rubber duckie" (technically, it refers to the use of bathtub rubber ducks as dildoes, but not exclusively) I graduated into the hardcore spanking scene. 

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The background: In 1991 (at age 16), I was subjected to a pants down beating at catholic school detention. The three of us who were disciplined with a strop that afternoon received the beatings openly in the detention class to serve as examples. I was in detention that afternoon for smoking a cigarette on school grounds. The other two were there for fighting in the parking lot. Each of us got 20 hard licks with a leather belt. 

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     Miguel Angel Torres in October 2000

In 2000, I developed an affair with one of my business school instructors in Amsterdam, his name was Aadrian. It was he whom I met at Argos that night on December 31, 2000. He just happened to be there when I arrived, it was unplanned. He asked me to stay with him, and at around 2 AM into the new millenium; I followed him to the Stable Master hotel for an after-hours with some of his Australian friends (all into the Western Bondage scene) and from there we went to a rubber duckie gathering at a pent-house loft elsewhere in Amsterdam. It was from the Australians ("We are Australian money" one of them told me) that I learned about the spanking scene . I was at a loss...why would anyone want to be caned or strapped for fun and pleasure? I told the Australians and Aadrian that I had been subjected to a very painful strapping at catholic school at age 16. Aadrian laughed and replied that his father routinely beat him NAKED with a belt from age 6 to age 16 as a form of discipline.

The leather and rubber guys who are into the spanking kink are members of "the brotherhood of the belt & paddle"; those of us who experienced the pants down treatment as boys. The kink is meant to transmute the memory and psychological impact of humiliation by turning spanking into a bondage game. Like turning the word "queer" from a pejorative to a term of pride. To be part of the brotherhood is a source of pride. A couple of weeks later, I was inducted by  one of the Australians into the Western bondage version of the kink: I was subjected to the Montana Flogging (the punishment for underage boys who stole horses in the 19th century West). The gay kink version was 20 licks of the strap followed by 20 licks of the horse whip. The historical version was a harsher 30 by 30. 

The era of the leatherbar was ended by the dating app. Grindr and Growlr killed The Argos. Progress. It is easier to meet people and hook up on an app.The gay leather bar lost its reason for existence and consequently its business. 

(no need for the bar when you can go directly from the app to the private party) 

... And Gay leather subculture ceased to exist as a postmodern urban tribe... 

(it split into specific kink niches...)

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Montana Flogging Experience (Rotterdam,  January 2001). 

The master was JD Allen. He was 36 at the time I was inducted. He was from Australia and into the Western bondage kink. This subculture is a subset of the gay BDSM scene particular to North America and Australia. JD sported a cowboy hat, tight Wrangler jeans and snake skin boots. Instead of a necktie, he wore a bolo. He played loud American country music when he performed his arts. In the Western bondage spanking scene they focus on the horse whip and the leather strap. But JD's specialty was the Montana Flogging. Allegedly, this was the punishment for  boys under 18 who engaged in cattle rustling in Montana during the 19th and early 20th century. JD stripped me naked, had me lay flat on my stomach on a bench, bound my hands and feet with rope and stuffed a rag in my mouth, ostensibly to muzzle the screams. He went at my ass with a strap and then a horse whip that afternoon. I screamed, moaned and squirmed during the length of the beating. I took 20 licks of the strap and 20 licks of the horse whip. The pain and humiliation where overwhelming. I was 24 years old at the time. This was initiation into the Western bondage kink spanking scene...

My last spanking experience as passive took place in Stockholm during the 2006 Pride. I was  31. I spent one evening at a gay BDSM venue where the basement was a bondage playground. In the venue's lounge there was a screen featuring BDSM films. I sat on a leather couch watching next to a Swedish leatherman. He offered me poppers, stripped me naked, placed me across his knee and spanked me by hand - hard. My ass was so sore afterwards that I could not sit on the Tunnelbana (Stockholm subway) back to town... 

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Articles by Camille Paglia @Salon

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(c) The Order of Jude: Andrew(s) Nicolas Moran, Miguel Angel Torres, Manuel Mendoza, Jaime Varela, Miguel Amanda and Emmanuel Goldstein. 

A collaborative project.